Every day is Presidents' day in the DPRK, but here in America we honor our Dear Leaders' dedication for just a single day -- one that we get more benefit from than they do. In the spirit of that celebration -- our enjoyment not theirs -- we've collected these 20 quotes of Presidents living and dead. So before you enjoy your three day weekend, take a moment to revile in the wit, witticisms and flubs of our Presidents. From Abraham Lincoln, to Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush and our current Commander in Chief, President Barack Obama, we have combed through the funniest presidential quotes to wish you a happy Presidents’ Day this 2016!
'"The Middle East is obviously an issue that has plagued the region for centuries."—President Barack Obama (Answering a question on U.S. treatment of Palestine)
"I'm glad I’m not Brezhnev; being the Russian leader in the Kremlin, you never know if someone’s tape recording what you are saying."—Richard M. Nixon (Whose recorded conversations later proved his involvement in the Watergate scandal)
"Man cannot live by bread alone. He must have peanut butter."—James Garfield
''Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, 'Certainly, I can!' Then get busy and find out how to do it.''—President Theodore Roosevelt
''My fellow Americans. I'm pleased to announce that I've signed legislation outlawing the Soviet Union. We begin bombing in five minutes.''—President Ronald Reagan (Joking in a radio address)
''When I take action, I'm not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It's going to be decisive.''—President George W. Bush
''I want you to know that also I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent's youth and inexperience.''—President Ronald Reagan
''Who is Barack Obama? Contrary to the rumors you have heard, I was not born in a manger. I was actually born on Krypton and sent here by my father Jor-El to save the Planet Earth.''—President Barack Obama (Making fun of the birther movement at a fundraiser in NYC)
''My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference.''—President Harry S. Truman
''I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered together at the White House, with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone.''—President John F. Kennedy
“I'm a greater believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it” ― Thomas Jefferson
''It was America's first instant Vice President -- and now, America's first instant President. The Marine Corps Band is so confused, they don't know whether to play 'Hail to the Chief' or 'You've Come a Long Way, Baby.'''—President Gerald Ford
''You'd think he was running for First Lady.''—President Bill Clinton
''He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas better than any man I ever met.''—President Abraham Lincoln
''Being president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There's nothing to do but to stand there and take it.''—President Lyndon B. Johnson
''For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex...uh...setbacks.''—President H.W. Bush
''My esteem in this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.''—President Jimmy Carter
"I am not fit for this office and should never have been here."—President Warren G. Harding
"No man who ever held the office of president would congratulate a friend on obtaining it."—President John Adams
"Blessed are the young, for they will inherit the national debt."—President Herbert Hoover
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